Home 2012: 5 The Good Guy with the Goodies

The Good Guy with the Goodies

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‘Inspired’ by Najib’s spree of handouts, People Watch was prompted to write this little poem.

‘PM: Don’t idolise the bad guys’ (The Star, 12 September 2011)

Najib seems to be saying, “Idolise me, the good guy!”
Don’t worry about Altantuya
Never met her, never knew her
I am the good guy with the goodies
Don’t worry about the theft of jet engines
While I was Defence Minister
I am the good guy
Don’t worry about the Scorpene submarine scandal
You-know-who received at least RM570 million as commission
For being cooperative and sharing in every way
I am the good guy with the goodies
Remember, I said I did not know Saiful
Before he went to see the doctors
It was a slip of my memory
I am the good guy
I gave cabinet posts to the discredited, disgraced and discarded
Tsu Koon, Shahrizat, Mukhriz and Rais Yatim are grateful
I am the good guy
Unlike ordinary people, I and my cronies
Went to Mecca by executive jet,
I am the good and holy guy
My philosophy is: You help me, I help you
I’ve literally run riot distributing goodies around the country
I am the good guy with the goodies
I’ve given the nation plenty of acronyms
ETP, NEM, NKRA, TAPS, STAR, KPI etc. etc. etc.
I’ve also given the nation KR1M to lower cost of living
Don’t ask me who took the CREAM
I am the good guy
There are more goodies to come as GE13 approaches
Don’t worry about the national debt, only 55 per cent of GDP
I am the good guy with the goodies
You help me, I help you
I’m the most creative, innovative guy in the country
Without Apco, I gave you 1Malaysia
To create unity and harmony
I am the good guy
Don’t take the Auditor-General’s Report to heart
Itu macam biasalah
I am the good guy with the goodies
So help me God.

People Watch is the pseudonym of an occasional contributor to Thinking Allowed

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