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Is it kosher to wear red underwear?

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Mustafa K Anuar is facing a serious moral dilemma: is it okay to wear red briefs bearing in mind that the colour may be associated with communism?

In these times of uncertainty, it is certainly a God-sent relief that we have in our midst moral guardians such as Perak Mufti Harussani Zakaria who would draw a line in the sand whenever confusion reigns in society particularly over ‘morality’ and faith issues.

Harussani has opinions on many things and offers categorical answers to the many questions that challenge us all, from yoga to AIDS to, most recently, poco-poco.

In the case of poco-poco, he decrees that it’s a no-no to Muslims as the dance has elements of Christianity although Christian friends of mine irreverently chuckled when told so.

Harussani Zakaria

While we’re talking about dancing, I wonder whether the good cleric has an opinion on limbo rock. For instance, how low can one go without one’s faith sliding precariously in the process?

But I digress.

Certitude is indeed very much needed in these days especially when what counts for pornography, once dubbed haram, has of late been permitted by the powers-that-be to be screened and watched by at least a select group of local literati.

It’s comforting to know that once and for all the line between right and wrong has finally been firmly established by the government, if not the trigger-happy trio (who wear the cloak of moral guardians), over what appears to be a grey matter. This is of course not in reference to the grey monochrome property of the blue movie in question.

Not quite there yet, though. The line is being redrawn what with the ulama having declared lately that the very act of parading and broadcasting (on the internet) the sex video is indeed haram. Ah, such an anticlimax! Just when we thought watching porn on the job is already ‘cool’ in Malaysia.

Corruption, for one thing, has not only become rampant in our society but has also become part of our ‘eastern culture’. As a people who crave for certainty in these troubling times, Malaysians read the seemingly lackadaisical approach of the moral guardians towards corruption as something of consent. This blessing, explicit or otherwise, adds another dimension to our moral compass, which is crucial for our day-to-day existence.

I won’t bring up the issue of the yawning cleavage between the rich and the poor as there’s really nothing ‘immoral’ about it. After all, this social fissure has been there in society since time immemorial and is therefore a natural thing – and hence it shouldn’t be within the purview, let alone worry, of the moral guardians.

Finally, with the deepest concern for the moral bearings of our society, would someone care to tell me whether it’s kosher to wear red underwear? This is to make sure that such undergarments will not cause irreparable damage to the morality and well-being of our beloved society given that the colour carries eerie connotations of communism.

Mustafa K Anuar is assistant secretary of Aliran

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